Feeling emotionless. Of her heart.

I can't cry. I don't laugh like I used to before. 2 years ago I had a break up. Since then I feel i have had this problem. I thought I was over it and I was having multiple physical partners after that. I have made blunders in my life and I still don't regret any of them. I don't feel guilty even if I have hurted anyone's feelings or emotions. I pretend that everything is fine with me. But if I ask myself I don't feel everything is fine. I am lacking enthusiasm in everything I do. I don't get the output even if I am working hard. I am not even career wise settled yet. I am scared of relationships and people around. I feel everyone is going to play with my emotions. So I just get physical with the guys which I feel is what they want. I want to get out of this vicious circle and start a new fresh life. I sometimes eat a lot and sometimes I don't eat at all. i don't feel physically healthy. I wish to see myself as a confident women who smiles from the bottom of her heart.