Suppressing Feeling, Anger, overreaction

Hi, I am in a relationship from last 8 years in which 7 years were Long distance and still now also we meet only for very little time, i love him too much and i respect him too but because of his cheatings on me, i started fighting with him.. but those cheatings were like 3-4 years back. I am always honest with him in these 8 years i never cheated on him, i made it clear to me that if i love him truly i will never need to fall for any other men and i never did.. and i think because of my this thinking i am still not able to forgive him. His actions shows that he truly regerts those things because we were in LDR and he was immature at that time but he loves me dearly. And still want us to be together but neither i can forgive him nor i can let him go. Everyday i am making him and me both suffer my anger. I will say things in anger and sometimes i will supress my feelings and go in shell. Please help me i can't go on like this i am killing both of us.