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My husband wont apologize after blunder
Hello. I have been married for 7 years. My husband has always had this habit of not apologizing after doing things that hurt me. Some mistakes are new but some repeat again and again even after i cry and tell him that he is hurting me. Since last year, we are planning to have a baby but in vain. Recently i am on fertility hormones and cycle tracking with sonography. it is all very hectic with doing all chores at home but i dont get any mental support. He never comes to gynae with me. This cycle my husband wanted to do IUI so that we have more chance of concieving. i was heavily on hormones and felt very sick. After IUI, gynae asked us to have intercourse to improve chances. my husband knew this but he didnt have intercourse with me for 2 straight days. now i dont even want to look at him or talk coz i feel so hurt. he never said sorry by words or action. even started showing me down in front of my in laws by asking my MIL for doing his chores that i do. What to do? i am in so much pain
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Hello, firstly wishing you all the best for the IUI treatment! I have noticed that you seem to be hurt because of your husband, also as you mentioned that you are on fertility hormones, this can also be a cause for you to feel fragile. I also notice that you mentioned some strong points about your husband not following the doctors advice and putting you down in front of your in laws. Seems like you both are not able to coordinate well and need some help in your marriage and communication.
Next Steps
Would recommend you to attend marriage therapy or couple counselling
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Hi appreciate you for approaching us. Both couples need to be counseled if not atleast you need to take counselling and be confident to handle. Express your feelings , concerns with me online via practo.
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Kindly connect with me for all marital and family related issues. I am a clinical psychologist and deal with couple issues.
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Hello. It could be really painful to feel disrespected and neglected, especially by a spouse. And Yes, Apology is a also a sign of respect. But there are a whole lot of other aspects of a marital relationship that we need to look into, such as his personality and upbringing, your personality, and the way both of you deal with things.etc,. I understand that it is difficult, but you might need to rethink your ways. Eg. 'What made me let my partner disrespect me? ' ' What made me accept or tolerate it for so long? ' . We need to find effective ways to communicate your needs and feelings comfortably. Keeping all to yourself and hurting inside is not going to help,instead it would only make it difficult for you. With all that said, please do talk to a therapist/ Counsellor or any mental health professional. It's okay to seek help. We all need such help at some point in our lives(including us) . You, posting this concern is the first step, and it is really appreciable.👏 Go ahead, get help. We all deserve to be happy... Love and Peace to you..
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Ms. Rajatha Sarkar
Psychologist
17 yrs exp
Bangalore
Hello dear thanks for your approach to us. I understand your situation, your stress , yes it is painful, certain times we can't accept the disrespect from our own loved ones.
However in dealing the family issues there are many things necessary to think about like communication, expectations, accepting the way person reacts in some situations ( may not be all) , ignoring few distress incidence rather than carrying it..
More over you both have different upbringing and exposure, that could make a lot differences in opinion/ response.
I understand you could be lacking support from his end and family, however try to understand your emotions, think about what is bothering him to react in the same, you both try to work calmly, as you have family planning and other responsibilities.
Both try to spend time to share each other emotions, enhance the bondage.
Next Steps
you can take the help of marital or family counselor for better guidance. take care stay safe 🙏
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Ms. Hema Sampath
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
I understand your situation and the pain in you.
Yet, I suggest you to handle those anger and Irritation in you which might help you to overcome this issue..
For a detailed discussion and understanding, you can connect with me by using the link given below :-
https://prac.to/hema-sampath-psychologist-dir
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Ms. Radha K
Counselling Psychologist
9 yrs exp
Bangalore
Kindly fix an appointment with a mental health professional of your choice. This could help you resolve your present concerns.
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