Depression. Is no one to support me?

Hey! It must be very difficult for you to go through the marriage process while feeling like that. It must be excruciating. I can not fully comprehend what you must be going through but I can understand. But you must talk to your partner and share this if you love him and trust him. Make him understand that you are suffering internally and you need his support to go through this. Consult a psychiatrist also and start a medicine. It will take time to have its effect. So start as soon as possible so that some energy gets back to you. Always be around someone. I know you would want to be alone. But that is not a good idea. Your mind is not letting you make good decisions right now. So don't trust it for some time till you get the balance back. Even if your mind tells you to be alone or to do something as that will make you feel relieved don't trust it for now. That won't make your condition better. Share your suffering with the person you trust the most. And consult a psychiatrist as soon as possible.